I am in the midst of yet another emotional breakdown. Pregnancy paranoia has certainly set in. Sometimes I really hate myself for not being able to relax. It’s not that I am not trying to chill out and stop worrying, I literally cannot do it. One I vanquish one fear, another comes at me full force. This week, it’s that something is wrong with Knox. Chromosomal issues, abnormalities, whatever, I have been totally panicked. Why? No reason at ALL. Every single test and ultrasound we have had has looked amazing and perfectly normal. I guess I just like to bombard this poor little baby with all of my stress hormones. I begged the doctor for an ultrasound today so I could be told everything is okay, but I was denied and offered Zoloft instead. I declined. I absolutely cannot allow myself to take medication for stress, even though I probably should. This practice says Zoloft is safe during pregnancy, but I have seen a few studies that say otherwise, I am not 100% okay with that idea. Instead, I am starting counseling next week in hopes for a “natural” way to calm down. I scheduled a facial for myself this afternoon, and I moved up the 4D ultrasound (December 7th!) which I will be attending sans husband since he doesn’t want to do it. I hate that he won’t be with me, but for my own sanity, I think I should do it! Baby Knox, I am so sorry that your Momma is a total freak.
And now, as promised, updated nursery pictures. The first is of a stool that my dear, wonderful friend “Aunt Lindsey” painted for Knox and brought over last night. She is incredibly talented and it matches his room perfectly! There are even tiny palm trees on the sides. Thanks Linny Boo (<-- just her drunken nickname, I'm J. Moo in case you wondered... ah the fun we used to have getting wasted on boxed wine, playing Super Nintendo and making up names for each other)!
Palm Tree decal, new chair (aka most comfy thing ever invented) and the curtains I am recycling in here because 1) they’re cute and 2) they were very expensive. Enjoy!
This work, unless otherwise expressly stated, is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.